In WTF news: Persistence Pays Off…

We were disturbed by the following recent headline, “NFL Player Chris Chambers Marries His Stalker.” Um, what?

How much of a raging narcissist do you have to be to dig the fact someone is obsessed with you? And who is this woman who would tie the knot with a dude who filed criminal charges against her?

Ugh. We feel this is setting a dangerous precedent: persistence pays off, even when it’s self-destructive and completely nutso.

Red Flags: Don’t Be Too Lazy to Recognize Them When You See Them

Early-twenties me would often blatantly ignore the most obvious “red flag” moments in the beginning stages of dating a new beau, when it is CRUCIAL to fully process these life-defining moments.

What am I talking about?

Here’s an example from my life: when a man you enjoy the company of being around says to you, “I’m a ramblin’ man,” as serious as you would say, “I’m a vegetarian,” this is a huge Red Flag. In fact, it’s so gianormous that you should immediately walk away. Not that week or that month, but that moment. If it’s not obvious (as it was not, apparently, to me) he is saying: I am a dopey narcissist with commitment issues who would rather Peter Pan his way through life than be with you.

The psychology behind ignoring RF moments is simple: a) you don’t believe him or b) you believe him but feel that your “connection” is strong enough to stomp that red flag into oblivion…eventually.

No matter. You cannot be too lazy to find another man. If you think it’s too much effort to meet someone, consider this: The truth is you will end up doing a lot of “work” on this dude who will never appreciate it or you and you will be a big bitter loser in the end.

Now that I am committed to Red Flag-ing all applicable moments, I realize how man a regular Lazy Broad can encounter in her lifetime.

We dug some of the classics out of the vault for the purposes of education:

“I got into a bar fight last night. It was no big deal.”

“I kind of dated this girl for the last few years, well, I mean, we weren’t really dating. I don’t know what you’d call it.”

“I’m not working right now, but I have a birthday coming up, so, you know, that should bring in a little scratch.”

“I’m living off my music.” (when he lives on someone’s couch)

Now it’s your turn. Feel free to add to this list with your own RF moment…

Troy Dyer. Our poster boy for Red Flags.